This post compiles a list of some of the most commonly asked questions about disability. While this list is not exhaustive, and people can have their own opinions on different topics, we cover a broad range of basic ideas in disability studies and culture.
How do I know that what I’m asking is okay?
Always run it through your head first when considering asking anyone a question. Consider how you would feel if you were asked that question. Is it appropriate? Would I feel offended if someone asked me that? Don't ask if you are concerned that your question could be offensive. Remember, the internet has many great resources. If you genuinely want to know the answer to a question, many content creators and reputable websites online have probably already answered your question.
Is it okay for me to ask a disabled person if they need help?
This depends on the situation. Is the person in question in a situation where they seem stuck or struggling? Generally, most disabled people will appreciate being asked if they need assistance if they are in a situation where they need aid. Just because someone uses a mobility aid or takes longer to do a task does not mean they need help. If you ask and the person says no, then no means no.
Someone with a mobility aid appears to be struggling. Can I step in and grab their mobility aid without asking?
Mobility aids are considered an extension of a person’s body. This includes crutches, canes, wheelchairs, etc. Imagine if someone suddenly grabbed your arm from behind and started pulling you in a direction. Not being able to see the person and having them grab you unexpectedly would be terrifying. This is how it feels for most wheelchair users. For those who use crutches or canes, when their mobility aid is moved away from where they placed it, it can be difficult or impossible to grab and leave them stuck unless someone else can get it. Because of this, it is best never to grab someone’s mobility aid unless given express permission.
My child just asked about another person’s disability right in front of them. How do I respond?
Do not hush your child or scold them for asking questions. This teaches your child that disability is a taboo subject and inadvertently teaches us that disability is a topic that should be avoided and never discussed. If you understand the wheelchair or whatever aid is being used, explain it to your child in neutral language and clarify that it doesn’t make that person “weird” or “unusual.” If it seems appropriate, consider asking the disabled person if they can answer your child’s question. However, keep in mind that a disabled person has a right not to want to talk to your child about their disability. While many disabled people are happy to educate others on their disability, some people don’t want to or don’t feel like doing it that day, and that is perfectly fine.
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